The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
