We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize