i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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