i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize