I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
Randomize
