I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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