Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
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