All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Randomize