I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
