Is it normal to miss your booty call?
it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Randomize
