your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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