If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
