Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Randomize