Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
