Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
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