Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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