Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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