I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Randomize
