Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Randomize
