he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
