and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
