These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
