nut hugger
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
The beers last night were like the tears from god
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
