THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
my poor anus
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
