Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
