What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
