I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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