My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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