I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Randomize
