glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
