She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I see more hoeing in ur future
I'm really sorry I called you a "smug, arrogant, boyfriend-fucking piece of defecation". I was super drunk.
I was going to be mad, but then I remembered you don't use autocorrect and spelled everything correctly and I was kinda impressed.
Randomize