Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Randomize
