after a month anything with tits is on the radar
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
