whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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