I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
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