I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
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