you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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