O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
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