is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Let's get the cat blown out
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Randomize