: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
