were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Randomize
