He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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