Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
How's work?
Spinning.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
