yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
