I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
did you just send me my own nude
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
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