We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Randomize
