no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
