OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
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