Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Randomize
