Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Houston, we have a blender
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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