Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Michael Bay diarrhea
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
