He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
so let's talk penis.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
