I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
